My Kid Won't Go TO Bed!
My Kid Won’t Go TO Bed
“I’m so tired!”
“Bedtime is such a battle!”
“I feel like I’m in a nightmare!”
This is our bedtime routine:
1. Dinner is at 5:30pm
2. Quiet activities are after dinner [to calm down]
3. Fruit snack
4. Bubble bath 6:30pm (to relax) (I’m the one that needs it)
5. PJ pick out time (I let her choose) and brush teeth
6. She picks out two books to read (they are the same two every night)
7. Stuffed animals and silky are in the bed
8. Night light is on and hugs and kisses 7:30p.m.
Except, this is what happens:
“Mommy, I want the door open!”
(Ok, I leave the door open. Goodnight!)
“Mommy, I’m thirsty!”
(Ok, I give her a few sips of water! Goodnight!)
“Mommy, I have to go potty!”
(Ok, we go potty. Goodnight!)
“Mommy, my stuffed animal fell off my bed!”
(ok, I go put it back on her bed and give her a kiss. Goodnight!)
“Mommy, I need one more hug!”
( ok, I give her one more hug. Goodnight! Go to sleep!)
“MOMMY”...
No, no, no! I can’t do this !
I’m so tired! Now it’s 10:00p.m.
So, I go in and lay on her floor until she falls asleep.
I have no idea what time that was because I woke up still on her floor!
I’m so tired!
Night two:
Same bedtime routine except we talk about how important it is to get rest and that once I leave her room she has to stay in bed and let Mommy sleep.
“Mommy, there is a monster in my room!”
So, I go in, check under her bed and reassure her by looking around her room. Then I spray around her room with some of my lavender spray and tell her it will keep the monsters away. (lavender is suppose to relax you)
I also put one of her stuffed animals by her door and tell her it is to keep any monsters out of her room. I turn on soft music and tell her, Goodnight!
“Mommy, I want my stuffed animal back in my bed!” 🤯
(OMG! She has twenty stuffed animals in bed with her! I put it back, rub her back a minute, give her a kiss and say no more calling Mommy. Mommy is tired and going to bed. Goodnight!)
Night three:
Same bedtime routine, except tonight I put on my armor, talk to her about our routine and how she can’t call out for me and why it’s important for her to try to go to sleep once I leave her room. I give her extra hugs and kisses and tell her, Goodnight!
“Mommy”...
Wah, wah, wah!
That’s me crying as I lay in bed listening to her call, “Mommy!”
It’s another late night and she’s still awake.
I missed my favorite show again!
I feel like I didn’t give her enough attention today.
I feel so frustrated!
I’m so tired!
I put on my headset and listen to music to drown out her crying. (Yep, she’s crying now, too!)
I wish someone would rock me to sleep!
I know I can’t keep going in every night.
I know she needs to learn to fall asleep on her own.
I know I can’t give in.
I know I’m a good Mom even when my inner-self says, “just let her come into your bed.”
“Mommy”...
I begin my deep breathing exercise and count 1, 2, 3...
I know that if I go in again, tomorrow night will be the same battle.
I just need one good night’s sleep!
Maybe tomorrow I’ll try reward stickers…
Or, maybe even call the sleep clinic, for me.
At least I KNOW I’LL GET A FULL NIGHT’S SLEEP!
This scenario is most likely any of us Mama’s at some point.
We feel anxious about bedtime. Not only is it taking a lot of time each evening, it is disrupting the family.
If we continue to go in, over and over again, are we creating bad habits that will continue every night? Are we adding to the anxiety our child is feeling?
We ask ourselves, aren’t we teaching our child(ren) to soothe themselves, so they will gain independence,
and self-confidence?
Aren’t we teaching our child self-soothing, providing reassurance that everything is o.k., so she/he will learn they don’t need to be dependent on us to fall asleep?
Expert, Dr. David O’Grady suggests making bedtime calm and relaxing.
Make your child’s bed the most comfortable place so they feel cozy and secure.
He says it’s important to provide a lot of positive associations with bedtime: The perfect blanket or silky, favorite stuffed animals to sleep with, soft music or a sound machine playing in the background, a night-light on in the room, and keeping the room at cooler temperatures all help create a comfortable, secure atmosphere.
Letting your child know how proud you are of them is also important.
And, of course, lots of hugs and kisses.
Dr. O’Grady suggests sticking to a nightly routine, and setting rules, (such as no calling out and no getting out of bed) with consistency, and checking in occasionally with reassurance, will help your child make the transition to falling asleep on their own. Before long, she/he should fall asleep automatically and without any anxiety.
And, going out for ice cream to celebrate is a wonderful treat!
@Https://ogradywellbeing.com/services/child-sleep/